coquetry — flirtation
coquetería — the Spanish cognate of the same meaning
Do people even say “flirting” anymore? I tend to hear the much more violent-sounding term of “hitting on” being used, as in “He’s hitting on me.” But I prefer the gentler sounding “flirting with,” as in “He’s flirting with me.”
I used to be quite the flirt in my younger days. In other words, I was a “coquette.”
“Coquette” is a French word that we’ve borrowed and added to our language, and it’s the feminine version of “coquet.” “Coquet,” the masculine version, literally means small rooster, or small cock. Yep, small cock, as “the cock crows” —get your head out of the gutter. Ha, ha.
Since a rooster likes to strut and parade around the hen house, showing off for the ladies, the French started referring to men who did the same thing as “little roosters” or “little cocks.” Thus, the word “coquet” was born.
Not too many people know that “coquet” in English can be used as a verb meaning “to flirt” or “to act like a coquet.” Thus, you could say, “He’s coquetting with me.” In Spanish, there is a cognate for that verb; it is “coquetear.” The same sentence would be, “Él está coqueteando conmigo.” Doesn’t that sound so much prettier than “He’s hitting on me?” I think so. It even sounds prettier than “He’s flirting with me.”
Why we English-speaking people felt the need to come up with the word “flirt” instead of just using “coquet,” I don’t know; in fact, the word “flirt” has an unknown etymology, so we should have just stuck with using “coquet.”
Arguably, “flirt” does have other meanings and usages not having to do with the art of “coquetry,” so we could keep the word for those meanings and then use “coquet” for its lone meaning of being a flirt, or being a coquette.
On the other hand, thinking of myself as a little rooster doesn’t sound so attractive — it’s almost as bad as being referred to as a “chick.” Ugh. Language can be so infuriating even while being so beautiful. Hmmm, just like a little rooster, I guess.
Are you a “coquette” or a “coquet” or did you used to be one? Have your skills of “coquetry” become rusty? Mine have, but that’s okay. I’m quite content to no longer be a “chick” chased after by all the “coquets.”
Until next time. Please share this newsletter with anyone you know who has an interest in learning about words.
Tammy Marshall
Coquetry